[Ed.] More and more like you, dad
Published: June 19, 2005
My father was irresistibly irritating.
Throughout his life he kept making the same jokes. He loved puns. The same ones. Every day. Always.
“It’s hot!”, you would say after burning your tongue on some food.
“It didn’t get that off the stove…”, he would reply. Always. Nope, it got hot on the stove. Duh!!
Throughout his life he held the same opinions. On everything. All the time. Simple ones, most often based on his Faith.
“People don’t see where’s it’s going…”, he would state whenever a news item would touch upon the Middle East.
Look, just because his interpretation of the Bible predicted the re-estblishment of the state of Israel after 2000 years, the wide political involvement in the affair by the international community, the forming of the European Union and the direction which it is taking, and more such things, doesn’t mean that in fact these are highly complicated issues on which an opinion can only be stated after careful review of all the information available! Right?
I mean, come on…
The single news item he would really be interested in was the weather forecast. House-wide family silence was demanded and expected. At 6:oo PM, 8:oo PM and later, when they added more bulletins, at 1:00 PM and 4:00 PM.
He seemed to take the approach that all other things were simply a matter of “relax - God is in control”.
Old and….
When I walk to my part-time job, I’m a teacher, I often think about my father. Well no, that’s a lie. I often talk with my father. At times he still replies in those old ways; “the dish is never eaten as hot as it is served”, “well, people don’t see where it’s going…”, “relax- God is in control”.
I’ve passed many markers on my path. Markers he must have passed as well. Marriage. Kids. The hurt of a fight. The pain of a rebellious child. Illness. Faith. Doubts. Fears.
As I pass these markers I talk with my father.
- “I’m sorry dad, I didn’t know it could be this hard at times.”
- “Relax, son, God is in control.”
- “No but… I owed you more respect. Simply for living. For being a man.”
- “I love you. My door is always open for you, no matter what, no matter when.”
I can still remember his many mistakes, his many faults. But I see now how human they are, how common they are. And I see in which grace he accepted the things he could not change, prayed for the strength to change those he could.
I see how many illnesses befell on him - and how he carried them strong, courageous.
This much is True
Well before he died I made sure to have said the things that need to be said between a father and a son.
But there is no loss in repeating truth, is there?
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DadThank you, dad, for the numerous vacations you drove mom and me to. Thank you for the cart you built me; that was a really cool one. Thank you for inflaming me with the love of technology and gadgets. Thank you for your example of simple, unwaivering Faith. Thank you for showing me courage. Thank you for standing up for me. Thank you for all the times you picked me up or brought me somewhere. Thank you for being so proud of me. Thank you for your beaming eyes whenever someone said we look alike so much. Thank you for the tons of things that take a lifetime to do, share, appreciate, and be thankful for.
Dad - your words are on my lips.
– Ruud
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